


It Must Be Thursday

by Claire



Category: Stargate Atlantis, Stargate SG-1
Genre: Established Relationship, M/M, Sex at Cheyenne Mountain, earthside
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2005-06-30
Updated: 2005-06-30
Packaged: 2019-01-21 12:58:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,475
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12458286
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Claire/pseuds/Claire
Summary: Jack O'Neill hated surprises...





	It Must Be Thursday

General Jack O'Neill muttered to himself as he stalked down the corridors of Cheyenne Mountain. He hated surprises. They tended to be bad, dangerous and messy, and he just didn't like them. Not unless they involved Daniel, caramel sauce and a blindfold. Jack stopped for a moment, surreptitiously adjusting himself before continuing.

Unfortunately, most of his recent surprises had been the sort that involved the bad kind of hurting, a whole lot of blood and people with glowing eyes. Hence the not liking them.

Which was why when the Stargate started spinning this morning Jack had had a bad feeling in his water.

The feeling had stayed through Davis announcing the receipt of an IDC that claimed to be from the Atlantis Expedition. It stayed through the security detail settling into the Gate Room just as the 'Gate sprang to life and spewed out a dozen or so people, all looking like they'd finally managed to get the ruby slippers to work. It stayed right until he looked down into the newly arrived mass of bodies and stared straight into the smirking face of Doctor Rodney McKay.

And then it got worse.

The minute the wormhole had shut down after the Atlantis Expedition had first left, the scientists at both the SGC and Area 51 had started working around the clock to figure out a way to maintain a sustainable wormhole to the Pegasus Galaxy. Colonel Samantha Carter had made it her pet project, working on it every spare second she had. Jack had lost count of the amount of times he'd seen Janet Fraiser physically pulling Carter away from her lab.

Only now it seemed like she needn't have bothered. Because, according to Elizabeth Weir, Atlantis now had a device built into their Gate systems that allowed a sustainable wormhole between them and Earth. A device that had been jury-rigged by McKay and one of the other scientists after they'd found it lying about in what had appeared to be some sort of learning area.

An annoying Canadian and a short Czech guy had done by themselves what the best minds in the United States Air Force and sciences had been unable to. And they'd done it with something they'd found in the equivalent of an Ancient kindergarten. And to make things worse, when they'd come back through they'd managed to reverse engineer a copy of said device on the Earth's Gate, making travel between the two galaxies possible in both directions.

When the President had found out he had wanted to give them his personal congratulations. Jack scowled some more. Not that he thought that would impress McKay. Hello! Canadian! Maybe if he had the Queen on line two it would be another matter.

Not that it would make any difference _who_ was on the line if he couldn't find McKay. He'd managed to track down Zippy after only a couple of minutes, but for some reason, McKay was eluding him like a ninja on crack.

"You!" Jack pointed towards a random airman, inwardly smirking when the young man physically jumped before snapping to attention.

"Yes, Sir?"

"Have you seen Doctor McKay?" He'd left the man arguing with Carter over some doohickey and when he'd gone back to get him, both of them had been gone. So now here he was, wandering around his own mountain trying to track down a guy who couldn't even pronounce the letter z correctly.

"I saw Doctor McKay dragging the Colonel into Lab Seven, Sir. There was banging and some muffled yelling and then it all went quiet."

Jack raised an eyebrow. Lab Seven. Carter's lab. The one with the hidden stash of Hershey bars in the third desk drawer. Although he couldn't see Carter letting McKay drag her anywhere. Not unless he'd found out about the Hershey bars. Jack had seen McKay on the hunt for chocolate and it wasn't pretty. The guy would give Teal'c a run for his money if he thought a Cookies'n'Cream bar was the prize.

"Right. Carry on," Jack looked at the airman, trying to work out exactly what the man was doing, "standing."

"Yes, Sir!"

Several more corridors took even more of his life and left him at the closed door to Carter's lab. He raised his hand to knock when a muffled sound came from behind the door.

Jack paused, pretty sure that it had sounded like McKay moaning, but hoping he was wrong. He stepped closer, utilizing a method taught to him in Black Ops and passed down through each generation of stealthy and deadly warriors, and placed his ear against the door. He listened carefully. There! Definitely McKay. Definitely a moan. Definitely McKay moaning in a not-bad kind of way.

Jack jerked his head away, trying not to think about it. McKay and Carter in a lab with sex noises coming out of it. Janet would be furious about this. There'd be fighting and arguing and Fraiser using her doctor powers for evil, and then Cassie would blame him for her mothers breaking up. And what the hell was Carter doing cheating on _Janet_ with _McKay_ for?!

Okay, so the guy pulled off arrogance with a certain sexy panache, and he had an ass you wanted to grab with both hands. Not that Jack had thought about McKay's ass in any way. Especially not in the grabbing kind of way. Okay, so there was that one time in the briefing room, but that was an accident. Honest.

Jack sighed. There was a reason he hated surprises, and this was it. You get out of bed in the morning, perfectly happy, and then your long lost expedition from an alien galaxy comes home and it all hits the fan.

Seeing no other option, Jack lifted his hand and pounded on the door. "Open this damn door!" he yelled, curiously satisfied when he heard McKay's muffled 'Oh hell!' and the muted fumbling and rustling going on in the lab. "McKay!" Another thump on the door. "Carter! Open this door!"

"Er, sir?" A voice came from his left. "I can't. Rodney's got the keys."

Jack's fist stopped in mid air, suspended as he spun around to face the blonde standing next to him. "Carter?"

"Yes, sir?"

"You're not in there with McKay?" Jack felt his eye twitch as his clenched fist dropped to his side.

Carter's face twisted, looking like it was unsure whether to settle on amused or offended. "Hardly, sir."

"Then who-?"

The lab door opened and a flushed-looking McKay peered out to cut off Jack's question.

"What?" McKay snapped.

"Who's in there with you?"

"No one!" McKay exclaimed, a horrified yet guilty expression on his face. "What makes you think-?"

Jack ignored him and gave the door a shove, pushing McKay out of the way to see Colonel John Sheppard pulling on a boot.

"General!" Sheppard pasted a smile on his face and saluted. "We were just... talking about you."

Jeez, he seriously hoped not. "Really?" He ignored the stifled snigger that came from Carter as he drawled the word out over far more syllables than were actually needed.

"Absolutely," nodded McKay, a hint of franticness to the movement. "Talking about how well the mountain is doing in your very obviously capable hands."

Sheppard stepped forward, standing slightly behind McKay and doing something that made the other man's eyes bug slightly. "Yes, Doctor McKay was very emphatic about your very capable hands." He flashed a grin that made Jack suddenly want to go and find Daniel.

Burying the urge to seek out his archaeologist, Jack pinned McKay with his gaze. "Doctor McKay, the President would like to speak to you."

McKay frowned. "The President? Of the United States?"

No, Jack thought, of the Colorado Springs Stitch and Bitch. "Yes."

"Well," McKay glanced back at Sheppard. "That's nice."

Jack's eye twitched again. Nice? McKay had the most important man in the free world wanting to speak to him, and all he thought was it was nice? Jack would never understand Canadians. Even if they did breed good hockey players.

"My office," Jack said. "Twenty minutes. He's ringing back."

McKay nodded. "Of course, General."

Jack turned away, taking only a couple of steps before looking back. "Oh, and Colonel Sheppard?"

"Yes, Sir?"

"Next time you try to cover up illicit sex in the mountain remember it's easier if you fasten your BDUs first." Jack had learned _that_ from first-hand experience.

Sheppard flushed red as he looked down, hands fumbling at his BDUs.

Jack grinned at the look on McKay's face as he walked away, glancing at his watch. Twenty minutes until he needed to be back in his office. Maybe he'd go and surprise Daniel. Nodding at Carter as he passed her, Jack stuck his hands in his pockets as his grin widened. There were days he loved surprises.


End file.
